On the Better end of Manic Depression

So I just had a pretty good night. Hung out with someone who was pretty special. We had so much deeply in common, yet she was very different. I love when you meet some one that you can se your self in but also see what you wish you were. That to me is the most appealing thing about a significant other. Not only being the same, but knowing that they have something special that you didn't know that you always wanted but don't have already. (yea)

I have dated girls before that had so much in common with me that we were like the same person. When that goes away though and you get comfortable, then that similarity kinda fades and you begin to dig deeper. In some cases, when you dig deeper, you look for different things they have that you don't. It is at this point that you MUST like what you see, and almost envy them a bit. I have seen people that, not to sound conceded, have not a whole lot to offer. I want a girl to blow my mind damnit! Some times things just get boring if you have nothing to gleam from your somebody. The best relationships Ive been in have been good because I envied that person for they had that I didn't.

I became really catholic for a girl once because I admired her faith so much that I wanted it. She was also a good piano player, so I started playing piano. I learned so many cool things from the chick, to bad she screwed me over, but thats a different blog for a different day/or not. I was really into that relationship because I felt so lucky to be with her and I was soo interested in her life that I wanted to know every thing about it.

In contrast, I have been in relationships where I really don't get excited about a person. They were great and all, and we had a lot in common, but at the end of the day I didn't really feel drawn into there lives, or worse yet, I kinda didn't care. I hate being that guy, so I usually end it before we get to attached, maybe thats commitment issues but thats a blog again for a different day.

So, I feel like I just had a break through. I now know what I want/need in a relationship. Someone who fits all the other criteria that I have, plus now, someone that I extremely admire, like there life is awesome and I want to be like them. Basically I need to find a beautiful girl who is way better than me in every aspect and that is ultimately way out of my league. Great... But its going to be worth it. To demonstrate my resolve here is a song. Thanks world.

Til Kingdom Come

Still my heart and hold my tongue
I feel my time
My time has come
Let me in
Unlock the door
I never felt this way before

And the wheel just keeps on turning
The drummer begins to drum
I don’t know which way I’m going
I don’t know which way I’ve come

Hold my head inside your hands
I need someone who understands
I need someone, someone who hears
For you I’ve waited all these years

For you I’d wait 'til kingdom come
Until my day, my day is done
And say you'll come and set me free
Just say you'll wait, you'll wait for me

In your tears and in your blood
In your fire and in your flood
I hear you laugh, I heard you sing
I wouldn’t change a single thing
And the wheels just keep on turning
The drummers begin to drum
I don’t know which way I’m going
I don’t know what I’ve become

For you I’d wait 'til kingdom come
Until my days, my days are done
And say you'll come and set me free
Just say you'll wait, you'll wait for me
Just say you'll wait, you'll wait for me
Just say you'll wait, you'll wait for me